I’m pretty sure I’ve done this before, but given my blog adventure last year, I’m not sure I’d know where it is. So, borrowed from Cassandra:

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
Made a conscious effort to eat more locally. Ran, and plan to again (well, hadn’t done that in 15 years, but that’s pretty close to never). Learned to have the guts to be my own patient advocate.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
My “resolution” centered on health, if you recall. All aspects of it. Among other things, I tackled purging things I don’t need (there is still much more to go), coming to terms with a new normal in my physical health, adjusted my perspective on what material-wise and food-wise  I view is healthy, tried to make some progress on the health of my marriage (baby steps), and a whole bunch of other little things. I wasn’t expecting monumental changes, but lots of little changes in lots of areas is a pretty sweeping attitude change. I consider it a success.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No, but there are at least a couple of babies coming in 2010 that I’m excited about!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, fortunately, but FAR too many people died who were close to people who were close to me. One degree of separation. Simply, too much pain for too many people I know personally and would not like to see a repeat of in 2010.

5. What countries did you visit?
Nothing new this year, unfortunately, but I WILL make it to the Netherlands in 2010. It may kill my pocketbook.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
An exercise routine that I stick to. I frankly wouldn’t mind being pregnant, but we’re still not actively pursuing that (and I’m ok with it).

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Probably Inauguration Day was the only one – for obvious reasons. My cousin’s wedding. The Sunny Day Real Estate show since I’d wanted to see them for SO long.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Grew a garden. My “resolution” was kind of a big one, in a strange way. Finally got the old tattoo on my ankle covered and got the one I had planned for my 30th birthday, which was 2 years ago, LOL.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not achieving anything bigger in 2009. My weight – after working so hard to lose weight before I went to Europe, I have inched up again. Lesson learned: age and metabolism are not friends. Not taking care of my debt and getting carried away by impulse buys.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No, thankfully. Just dealt with what I already have and attempted to manage it. I know what I need to do, it just seems to be up in the air as to whether or not I’ll do it.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My GTI.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
J, who is infinitely patient with my quirkiness, as always.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My mother and her husband. A large number of the people around the Metro DC area. In many cases, I agree with Cassandra about Americans in general – as in the post I referenced in #2.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Debt. Toys.  <- THIS needs to change.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Wonderful things happening for my friends and family.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
Unfortunately, anything by Lady Gaga, who I really don’t like.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:?a) happier or sadder? ?b) thinner or fatter? ?c) richer or poorer?
Happier, about the same, about the same.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Had more adventures.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Spending money and eating.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I spent it with my inlaws in North Carolina.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
No. Stayed in love, which is a big thing in and of itself.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Hmmm….I started watching a bunch of new shows this year that I hadn’t before….Mad Men? Biggest Loser?

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Hate isn’t worth the energy.

25. What was the best book you read?
Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Sparta. Why must I discover bands after they’re already broken up?

27. What did you want and get?
My GTI.

28. What did you want and not get?
There’s always something. New kitchen counters.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Probably “Up”…I did like “New Moon,” but in a hedonist kind of way.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 32. Spent time with my mother, went out to dinner at a new local restaurant. Other than that, I don’t really remember!

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Feeling like I belong somewhere in this world and having something significant to contribute.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Evolving. Found a blog that changed my attitude and have been running with it.

33. What kept you sane?
Having not too much of anything. Not too much work, not too much play….

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
No one really.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Marriage equality, I’d say.

36. Who did you miss?
My friends and family who are all over that place that are not HERE.

37. Who was the best new person you met? Why?
Didn’t really meet too many new people, but Facebook continues to be a fun place to reconnect with old friends!

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.
Just because you CAN have something it doesn’t mean you need to have it or should have it. I hope to apply this more in 2010.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
“You set a fire to forget, to burn up all you regret. But really, nothing has changed, today. You can’t go on this way.” – Sparta

Onward and upward, forward is the only way to go. Cheers to 2010.

I kind of doubt that I’m unique as the adult child of divorced parents who isn’t totally comfortable with this “holiday”concept. Maybe the slightly rarer detail is that my parents have been divorced since I’ve been an adult, but frankly, in this case, I actually think that makes this aspect worse. I get all of the awkwardness of new family units, all of the jealousy of parents forced to split time with their children, and none of the joys stemming from the creation of memories with some “new” family unit founded (disturbingly) at some point during my childhood. Translation: I’m lucky if only one parent is jealous of the time the other has been allotted for any given holiday, I always feel like a stranger in either parent’s home, and all the while, there are kooky reminders of what “used to be.”

This holiday – and actually, frankly, quite a few holidays – one parent gets worked up in some passive-aggressive manner about the time spent with the other parent, while the second parent really doesn’t “get” any of it. Maybe this was a symptom of the failure of their marriage to begin with, but I digress. I sit at my father’s house, the passing of hours punctuated by the same grandfather clock that punctuated the hours of my youth. Days are filled with the same car-care, home improvement activities of my youth. The same evening rounds of James Bond, the same beer brewing sessions. But the home in which all of this occurs? Bears no resemblance to my own. There is no comfort here. It’s like a hotel where they moved in all of the activities and occasional samples of some far-distant, fake home.

Continental breakfast is served at 7am.

The other home? Another hotel. This hotel feels more like home in some aspects. The meals I’m fed warm my stomach and soul in the same way as the holiday meals of my childhood, but there’s something not quite right. There are just enough things in this home that make it not quite home. Things that are not ours. Mine. Uneasy.

And every year, I fight this split. Manage and minimize feelings. Part of me cries on the inside because none of this….none of this….is a family holiday anymore. “Home is where the heart is” is a truer than true cliche, but for either parent to think they, alone, harbor that home, is simply naive. Holidays now are fractured, horrific, and sad – while everyone wanders around acting like it’s “OK.” And likely, for my parents in their new lives, new homes, with new spouses, it IS ok – and they want me to share in that. I don’t begrudge them that. But it’s not a drag and drop. These homes, these people – they are not my family. They are intruders. Necessary intruders to be managed. At least one of them doesn’t get that – while I’m happy for them – it’s never the same. It’s all obligation. Management. Someone is always unhappy. And – it’s usually not me. Because at this point, I’m mostly numb to it.

Family holidays that aren’t family and are only holidays because the calendar dictates.

More and more it makes me want to leave it all, have my own family and my own traditions. Or, insert myself into J’s family where the traditions are comprehensive, in one tight little bundle rather than spread over two households and two states.

Can you blame me?

I’m 32 and I’m the adult child of divorced parents.

What’s your favorite article of clothing?
** My new jeans from Mark Shale in Chicago that I wore in the photo shoot.

Who was the last person you hugged?
*** My ‘Bert (I don’t care that he’s not technically a person).

What’s your favorite dinner?
*** Tapas or Thai – toss up!

What was the last thing you bought?
*** Coffees for J and I at Dunkin this morning.

What are you listening to right now?
*** Sounds of the office….

What is your favorite weather?
*** Bright, crisp, fall weather.  (<- I second you, Nancy!)

What is your least favorite season?
*** Gray, freezing winter weather.  (<- On this too!)

Who do you admire the most?
*** I admire various people for various reasons.

Say something to the person who tagged you:
*** Nancy is one of the most determined, upbeat people I know.

What is your favorite dessert or cool treat?
*** Not a sweets fan.
What did you want to be as a child?
*** A ballerina, a lawyer, an architect, and an electrical engineer – in that order.

What do you want to be now?
*** Content with my life now, wherever “now” happens to be.

What is your favorite song?
***I don’t actually have one right this second. I’m looking to listen to something new and haven’t found *it* yet!

Which is you favorite country/state, and why?
*** Country – Italy or France.  For a state, I’d have to say Massachusetts.

If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?
*** Shopping. Can I have some money to spend, too?

What are your most challenging goals right now?
*** As always – finances and eating habits.

What is your 5 year plan?
*** Hmm. 37. Ouch. Somewhere in a college town, far from DC, probably with a similar job to mine now, one kid, cute old house with a decent yard, miscellaneous pets.

What is your favorite sport to watch?
*** I don’t have a favorite sport, but I like watching Purdue football and Red Sox baseball.

What show would you want to be a cast member on (reality included)?
*** Dancing with the Stars

What is your most prized possession?
*** My sanity. Most of the time. My health. All of the time.

Name one favorite childhood memory.
*** Camping with my family in East Hampton.

What is your favorite book of the Bible?
*** N/A

What is your favorite quote?
*** ” I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning to sail my own ship.” – Louisa May Alcott

….but, yeaaaaah….I’m gonna….

(Sorry to anyone who saw this on Facebook already. We’re pretty excited about how they came out!)

How I spend a nice bit of my morning. Red lights that go on…and on….and on…..

No picture for today – spent the day alternately worrying about ‘Bert and tending to post-op ‘Bert.  We may be broke for a bit, but there is no price we won’t pay for a healthy ‘Bert.

Cone free Bert a few weeks ago…

He is worth every penny.

With a clean yard and a beautiful morning, time to take Sunday breakfast outside. I made apple cinnamon pancakes – including two little ones for two certain canines. Yum.

Fall cleanup mostly done – crabgrass cleaned out, new grass seed down, garden cleaned up, decision made about what to with the rock side. Just a couple of more projects and we’ll be set for winter. Of course, they’re BIG projects – replacing a section of siding, a new grill cover, and a new back door. But, in the meantime, the yard is doggie tested and approved.

It’s SO much work and we are SO bad at it, but every year, when I think we should just rip it out and be done with it, I stand and look down at it with the fountain on and just go “AHHHH.”

Saved for another season.

This would have been a really great picture – had I actually had my real camera in my purse. Alas, all I had was my trusty iPhone.

I put my camera back in when I got home. This will not happen again.

The intersection of Prince and Washington in Old Town Alexandria. I walk through here no less than 4 or 5 times a week. Pilates or knitting or shopping or….
I just *live* in Maryland on a technicality. I do everything else here.